There is a More Excellent Way!
I need to begin by saying that I don’t believe that laws are bad or evil.
God Himself, who is the standard of good has given us “the” Law, which we are told [in His Word] is holy, just and good [Romans 7:12].
But, with this said, I do believe that any law, including laws that God gives, can be used in wrong ways, with wrong motives, and that eventually lead to wrong and unfruitful ends.
I also believe that there is an enormous chasm between God creating the world in an orderly way…and even giving certain laws…and…us being law-driven…or law-motivated people…do you understand the difference?
Because mankind has fallen into sin…this is a distinction that is very hard for us to keep our sights on.
Our minds are very “sticky” when it comes to being “law-motivated/driven”…and…
…very slippery to the idea of grace-motivation…or being grace-driven [grace being defined as unmerited favor].
The law-motivated or law-driven mind looks at one of God’s laws and thinks, “If I pursue my spouse and make them a priority then everything will go well for me. My obedience to these laws will bring happiness and blessing into my life.”
Sure, the law-driven mind might want to obey the law in order to bring happiness to their spouse…BUT…the big question we should ask is does the law-driven mind have the power or the motivation to want to bring happiness to their spouse…even when their spouse is being a jerk…even when their spouse isn’t pulling their weight and investing their 50% of the contract?
Stop and think for a minute. The very nature of a law says if you keep the law…then things will go well…BUT…if you do NOT keep the law…then things go south…and get ugly in a hurry!
With this in mind…the law-driven mind foolishly assumes that when it keeps one of God’s laws then ‘automatically‘…it has merited favor…it has earned a right…and because of this meriting or earning…then…
…God owes me blessings…God owes me favor! God owes me happiness!
And…when we flip the coin over and look at the other side, if I don’t obey one of God’s laws…but instead openly violate that law…then I should expect no favor and no blessing from God.
The law-driven mind feels very secure and joyful when it obeys the law, and very insecure and depressed when it doesn’t.
When the law-driven mind thinks it is obeying…it has the common temptation of feeling very superior…especially over those who are not obeying.
Because the law-motivated mind is trained to think of 1. receiving blessings for keeping the law…and 2. withholding blessings for violations of the law…I hope you can begin to see that this isn’t going to be the source of life and strength in your marriage or pre-marriage relationship!
In a world without sin, where no one was self centered and self promoting, the law-motivated marriage could prosper quite well…
But in the real world…the fallen world in which we live…the law-motivated mind will not bring prosperity into your marriage.
The law-driven mind will not give your marriage the life it needs to grow and flourish…
The law-driven mind will not give you the motivation and power to do good to your spouse…even when they don’t deserve it…because the law only holds out blessings when it is obey...when it is kept...when it is followed...it holds out NO blessings for those who break it!
The law-driven mind does not promote abundant mercy and forgiveness in the relationship…because that is not the function of the law. The law merely points out what must be done in order to receive blessings. If these conditions are not met…then…there is no blessings coming.
This makes for a very harsh, stern and unmerciful relationship…a veritable wasteland…
God made the world! And yes, this same God made a world that contains laws…but this same God has something upholding these laws…
The Creator God is not Law-driven…or Law-motivated…
God’s motivation is infinitely greater than mere law…and God’s motivation is the solid foundation on which all of His laws rest…
We will talk about this foundation…next time…